Jesmen, touch your own heart and say...

Let't play this song, 'Pearl Moon'. And if you have the time, read this post with the song playing...

Few days back, I came across Mr. Lee's blog and saw a post he has written for me. It is a post about my little birthday gathering more than a month back. Mr, Lee... don't make it sound so sad can? You make me feel bad lo. In the post, he mentioned "对于Jesmen，我心中都有一股亏欠，是那种对于兄弟之间，不够关心的亏欠。". Oh my god please, very tears inducing . You make me miss the time back then, when I was much a simpler person.

Click here to read the full post.

It is true that we spend less time together nowadays. It's not that I want this to happen, but like what you have said, we all have our own life to live and go on. To be honest, I feel that your place in my heart has dropped pretty much through these years. Probably due to the change in feelings towards you. Despite the very different paths we are leading, I can touch my heart and say that Mr. Lee is one such of a good friend I can ever have. There's just something he has that is so different from the other people. The simplicity, the kindness. It's a place much peaceful and less vunerable with him.

Ok enough said about this. MR. LEE, WANT TO MEET ME FOR LUNCH OR DINNER PLEASE JUST TELL ME. DON'T BE SO BUSY!!! Or maybe I should just initiate. LOL Alright, take care my bro.

Today, I wanna talk about another issue. I guess the locals are sure aware about the recent tragedy happened in Cambodia. Hmm... guess I'm pretty affected by the death of some of the members, especially one who I idolise pretty much. Maybe some of you guys are already very tired and miserable about reading this, but just let me put down my thoughts about it here once and for all.

One day, I was happily watching him doing his show on stage. Other days, I kept bumping to his pictures ont he net. And another day, he was on the newspaper... for a bad news. Sometime I wanna feel sad for him, I probably should since he's such an idol to me. Hmm.. but don't know why, I just can't find the correct feeling to correspond with my thoughts. It's like you want to be sad and should be, but something is hindering you from being so. Maybe, I don't know him much. Or, maybe death is something I have forgotten about fearing anymore. You will always have a place in my heart Reuben Kee.

Meat Market Part II

My friend posted me a question, asking me if I would be sold out one day.

Well, I guess my meat will always be there. When someone buys me, I can be discarded and later hang up for sales again. It's like a cycle. What the second buyer got less is not the physical attribute, but the emotional value. But again, who would care about being emotional in the meat market. Cos in the meat market it's all about physical devouring. The only way I can be sold out is when I'm totally taken out of the meat market scene. that's when someone holy enough, and powerful enough, rescues me. By then, I will not need to stay in the ugly market anymore. Waiting for someone to rescue myself is rare, really rare. Who knows that someone might be just another member of the meat market. He might be disguise. It's a sad sad society here. Where physical attributes count big time.

I can't say I'm an active member in the meat market, cos I'm in self denial now, I'm trying to escape. But no matter how, everyone here falls into the market in parts of their life. The temptation, the needs, the wants to be needed, the thrills. Guys want some interesting and new. It's a thing so natural and set, that no one can ever change it. If you ask me, of course I would wanna be out of this market. I had enough of dealing with market value and blah blah. Makes me thing of the Oricon chart, how Koda Kumi, Ayumi, Namie and blah blah are doing there. Lol... It's like competing on our sales rate. So tiring. Deep down, I know that my market value has being like dropping, cos it's a competitive market here. I'm kinda sick of selling and be indulge with all the superficial issues.

If someone is ever willing to show me that there's actually another more beautiful world out there, please take me along with you. Show me that this circle I'm in is filled with only lust and cruelty.

It's all about being able and have the ability and capability to get the good meat here. It's a competitive world where look & bod counts.(maybe even height and charm) Individuals who lack any of these inevitably lose out in the hunt.

Have I answered your question, my friend? Enjoy yourself in Aussie...

The Birthday Season

Gen & Jes House Invite - 131007

It was a crowded day at home with many of our family and friends. Ha ha... I don't know if it was a fun day or something, cos inviting my friends to my place for party is so not me. I can be really bored as a host. And I can only remember they are all stuck in my room, cos outside was just too crowded. The buffet wasn't really great that day, ha ha just alright only, but I have to thank my aunt and uncle for making effort to organise this celebration for us. I didn't invite many that day, just some of my good friends. It was Hari Raya too, so my Malay friends couldn't make it too.
Some Kid fun with her friends...

A performance for their friends

Gen and her classmate's younger sister.

The food~~~~

The girls and Jun yang was here.

JWW shot.

Mr. Lee & Kang Tai was here.

Jasper was here too. Too bad Tengyi was over in Japan working.

Gen's Birthday Cheesecake

Woo. . . Happy Birthday Gen.

Friends gathered in my room.

MI peeps, Xinyi & Crecensia.

My Birthday Ice Cream Cake.

Clap clap clap, while people sang me Birthday Song. So embarrassing...

Wished for something. Wishing on the same star, I hope. Actually I was thinking nothing.

Dad & Baby Jaden

The Birthday People

Double date with the little girls, Gen & Glennis.

MI peeps again...

My good good friends...

Is cutting ice cream cake with a CAI DAO a good idea?

Put on some of my presents. I'm Mr. shithead.

Getting cosy in bed. Sleepyheads!

Erm... don't know what they were up to.

After party...

What a nice way to officially close this party with a nice last shot.


Birthday Eve - 191007

That day was spent watching Love Actually @ my army friend's place and later dinner & movie with my usual guy clique. Kenny joined us too and brought along his friend. Dinner was decently nice. They served he-man meals. Was feeling so full after everything. After dinner, they decided order a slice of cake from the restaurant, so that they can sing birthday song for me. OMG, so pai seh. After that was, Resident Evil movie. Hmm, had not seen Kenny since like last Christmas until then. It somehow sets me to the emo mood again. Mariah Carey flows in~~~ JWJW should know this.
This is good...

Smiley sausages. He-man's meal.

Kenny and Tengyi

Jasper!

They ordered this so that they can sing me a birthday song. OMG...

A pic with Mr. KennyRason. Hadn't seen him since last Christmas.

Kenny & Ziguo

Trying to finish up the cake.

Hee~~~ dining fun...

I've got pressie from my 2 daddies~~~ LOL


My 21st - 201007

First half of the day was spent with Hung. He has never failed to delight me with the place he brings me to for meal. So, we had Mexican cuisine that day @ Holland Village. The food was pretty interesting, such an eye opener for me. Oh gosh, I always feel like a tourist when I'm out with Hung, when he is actually not local and is only here for barely more than a year. Aiyo... I need to discover more!
Chinese restaurants serve peanuts, they serve nachos. Cool!

Mexican mood...

The sauce is great.

A shot of Hung.

My food...

His...

Gummy Bear Ice Cream for me~ Wee~~~ Felt like a kid.

Second half of the day was spent with the girls of course. However, Yim wasn't there that day for some reason. So sad... I wasn't a really good night that day too. Not because Yim wasn't there. We didn't like have plans about where to go and how to spend the day. So we were sitting over @ Wheelock Starbucks drinking and cluelessly thinking about what to do next. It was also a connection day, and I was damn super emo. So sorry girls, I think I had affected them too that day. At last, they had the idea of going Trantric Bar for Choc Martini, so as to cheer me up. Ha ha ha. So there we were, heading to Tanjong Pagar. Coincidentally, Thrueno was there and he greeted me Happy Birthday. Wee... so surprised that he could actually recognise me. Kinda forgot about being emo liao. Cos I have hottie there greeting me. LOL. And unexpected, he is my big bro now.

We didn't manage to drink, cos the place was too crowded. So, we ended up taking pictures.

Was at Bugis first watching the Calendar Guys show. I heart Vincent Fok! Ha ha ha...

Connection time.

This dou hua is really really weird looking. More like custard.

Post Birthday - 211007

It was a cycling day with again, my guy pals @ East Coast Park. Haven't touched a bicycle for pretty long I think. Ha ha, it was good time spent cycling and listening to songs from my PSP. After that, I met up with Aviel to watch the Calendar Guys show. Vincent Fok was in it and we had dinner together after that. Omg, like dreaming like that.
Jasper checking out a nice spot to sit. It's all the same bro!

Emo Bicycle...

Great buddies of mine~

Time for some arty farty pictures.

I wish you knew... really...

I was living in my own world.

Playing with mimosa. Ha ha ha.

Aviel!


Gu Gu's Birthday - 291007

This day was simply spent having dinner at nearby Delifrance. Ha ha. Such a family outing. Pics of the food...

Waterfall's 21st - 031107

This was a blast. Ha ha... We had like ultra secretive special birthday plan for Pei. Erm... The day was spent having our album meeting @ Coffee Bean near National Museum. A fruitful and productive one I can say. With agenda met, we headed off to put our plan in action. We had somehow joined forces with her poly friends to give her a birthday surprise @ The Elizabeth (hotel located behind paragon). The plan was a success. Ha ha ha ha. Happy Birthday Watefall!
Pei and her poly friends.

JWJW!

Lesbian kiss.

Another lesbian.

This one might be lesbian too.

He's not definitely.

Act cute liao...

I'm bathing! Stop Peeking!

Shithead!

Helping Wendy wash her face. Wa ha ha ha!

Now, wiping her face.

OH~~~ Yim Yim don't catch a cold~~~

Bathroom Affairs

The birthday season is at its end already I guess. Would like to thank everyone who shared the times together during this special period of mine. Thanks for the time, the gifts and the greetings. Thank you.