So special love

Everybody needs love So special love

珍贵的所有就近在身旁

谢谢你

今天能够第一个见到你的笑容

让我好开心

一阵风吹过 照亮了心窝

虽然满街都是不顺心的事情

但我以不觉得自己有多悲惨

谢谢你

So many things happened for the past few months. I feel different now. With exams and projects coming close to the end, I have to really go all out for these two weeks. I got to clear my papers first, before thinking about what I'm always thinking. The past few days were solemn days for me. I feel that when relationships with people, like friends and so on, starts to have too much guessing and waiting, it will turn bad. Or I should say there shouldn't be any guessing in any relationships. There must be assurance. There must be trust. Tell me how do you feel. Am I correct to use the poem above to describe my situation. I hope so. No, I'm lost. I don't understand. Everything is too draggy. Or is it that I'm already been left aside. Why is this taking so long! I need the time!! I need it!!!

Coming near / Cheesecakes

8 more days before exams!!! Oh no! That's fast. I just hope that everything, including project work and A level chinese will be over in no time, so that I can go wild for my year end holiday. I wanna play and enjoy with my important souls. Oh man.

I love cheesecake.
I long for cheesecake.
I crave for cheesecake.
I just wish to have the whole cheesecake.

I WANT TO EAT CHEESECAKE!!!

I WANT TO EAT CHEESECAKE!!!

I WANT TO EAT CHEESECAKE!!!

Oh...cheesecake...my cheesecake...

Porridge Buffet - Pei's House - Yang

Hoo!!! Yesterday was a great day at start because we went to have porridge buffet, the one we awaited for long. The food was great, and I ate a lot (though not as much as before). Here one of the pictures of the food we had taken down. Spreads of homely gourmet. Awww... I wish I can visit there again real soon. Too bad jx kor doesn't like porridge, neither does yang. Should look for Leandro kor then. We were quite tired yesterday, due to different reasons. Together, we looked tired. The initial planning of venturing the whole city area have to be cancelled. We settled down at Fuzion cafe after some shopping and decided to leave the place after the drink. We got crazy again when taking a bus home, taking lots of photos of the 4 of us. the crazy photo taking session stretch to the night at Pei's house. We were totally mad. Ha ha. I realised our recent outings always include heavy photo taking. We can take more than 100 photos per outing. Oh mad... Then me and yang decided to meet up through MSN. We went shopping at Westmall and I saw this Sonic 3D PC game. I got to buy that!! Soon!! Soon!! Then he took me to a nearby coffee shop for Indian rojak. That was nice!!! Shall go there for it more often next time, and forget about saving my complexion. Haha.

Bus accompany.

Met up with cy earlier in the evening after school to go home together. Was asking him about some stuff. Kinda sad... Then don't know why, we start talking about cars and learning to drive. Ha ha ha. So mixed up and so confused. Part of me wants to be sad, while another part wants me to not think about it by making me do and talk about other stuff. Hah! How funny. Anyway, it's good to have friends taking the same bus with you home. At least, you will not feel bored. Ha ha. I have to stay happy and not let myself down. This is important. Be strong. Stand up. Jia you.

I will, 我会的.

意料之外的事情

今天再次

让某些人哭 令某些人笑


你给我的信息

我读了一遍又一遍

不知何以泪水有如决堤


相信最了解我的就是你

只要有你陪着我

无论任何时刻

我都能克服

所以请紧紧拥抱我永远别放手


让我不停吟唱难以言喻的这份心情

请不要忘记无论何时永远

and I will be with you...

A nice country club and a nice accompany.

Leandro kor kor brought me to this Seletar Country Club today after I finish all the nonsense in school(been called in to see vice pincipal, oh gosh). Kor got his card eaten up by the ATM machine. Ha ha ha, he's so blur. Must be thinking of me too much le. Opps... The swimming pool was nice, suana was nice, the food was nice. Everything was nice. I was kinda restless then. The activities really made me feel a bit more relaxing. So nice of him. He offered to pay for dinner at a open concept restaurant in there. The chicken wings and laksa were superb! Will want to visit there again soon. The day ended with him sending me off to my bus. Thank you for the day Leandro.

I wonder how have you been? Are you fine now? What are you doing now? I can only just wait for your news now. Come back, come back fast. We are here waiting for you, wanting to show you our love. Everyone's here waiting. Move on. Love ya.

Treasure...

Treasure what you have even if they don't favour you now. People always neglect this and regret later. Like me. Like everyone. I can't bring the lost back, I can't turn back time, all I can do is to hold the remainder tight. I'm losing, everyone does, but we just have to face the reality. Be strong and treasure the people still around. To all people around me. Treasure.

We'll be wishing on the same star, looking at the same moon.

在指向天空的

这双手指的那一头

有着渴望结合的

爱人

We'll be wishing on the same star, looking at the same moon.

A test about me.

I took a quiz, wanting to know more about myself, cos i'm quite unclear about myself now. Then I got this result. This will be my movie, the movie that reflects me.

What Classic Movie Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

Ha ha. Finding true love. Haiz...

Came in Handy

Today, school celebrated Mooncake Festival. The teacher-in-charge, Mrs. Heng found out that the person who was to be astronaut couldn't fit into the costume. So, Mrs. Heng decided to find me and you know, ask me to be the astronaut for the show later. Oh god! Ha ha, I was too nice to even reject the request. So, I helped out eventually. Mrs. Heng was very grateful and I had just received her message of gratitude. I came in handy. Ha ha. Such a bad time to perform though, considering my state now. Haiz... I was so fake trying to act like I was enjoying all the way. Who knows what I'm thinking of?
... ... ... ...
Speechless...

So indirectly So unwillingly

Today I was laughing away in the canteen during break. Laughed and laughed, until My tears dropped. My classmates thought that I'm crazy again, laughing over small jokes or may not even be jokes. That was so indirect, which I never thought I would be experiencing. I couldn't hold on and I needed to let my tears go. I didn't want people to see me breaking down, and so I was there using the jokes as a cover up, a cover up to my urge to cry. I laughed and cried, laughed and cried, for the whole break. Until I reached my class, still laughing and crying, Tessa noticed and see me throughly. My intention was exposed throughly by her. That made me wanted to cry more. Jokes, tears. How weird it is to break down in such a way. So unwilling to expose yourself to others. So indirect in releasing yourself. That may be because I knew I shouldn't cry at the first place. Who am I to cry for such things. Like I'm really so crucial. My conscious told me not to, but I just couldn't take the situation. To think of it, I suddenly realised how vunerable I am, and I am not that independent actually. I need the people I need. Those important ones. Like I would just fall if any of them disappeared. I need them, but I'm currently missing one, one important soul.

Ha ha! Kinda feel funny now that I actually broke down through jokes. How odd and stupid of me. I . . . . . . . . . . .I don't know. . . . . . . . . . .Hope these important souls will always be around me. I just wish time could past fast and get all thos sickening exams out of sight. I need comfort, I need you. Cos I"m single!!! (not so bad if I'm attached) Haha. Trying to convince myself.

Lost of human right for a decent meal / Rain / Missing You

School has re-opened. Became busy straight on the first day, got to complete homeworks and tackle new homework. Oh, life couldn't be busier. Hah!
Oh, and the Chinese stall which used to sell nice veggies and provide nice soups is now gone. I couldn't even get a decent meal today, meaning healthy food which is not oily and spicy. Heard my classmates saying that the stall was making losses, thus decided to close down. I had to go without my healthy meal and live with those junk food. Arghh... However, I later found out that they company will still cater the Chinese food here, but not cook here. Ok lah, at least I can still get my healthy meal during lunch time. Guess I will have to change my eating time, from eating during break to eating during lunch, or both!!! But I can't stand the malay one. Felt guilty and sorry for my complexion when i ate those.
Went home with tessa today. Alighted at payah lebar bus stop to take the train there. It was raining heavily, scary. Thought of Wars of the World suddenly. The gushes of rainfall, splashing to the ground like some firestone dropped from the sky. How imaginary I am. Then everyone was trying to prevent themselves from "getting hit" by those falling from the many corners of the MRT station. Scary! Then I thought of one of my close ones, cos he/she lives near there. Wonder what he/she was doing then. So long since we last met. Had a sudden urge to walk into the MOE building and demand for examinations to be scrapped. So emotionally unstable. Ha ha. See, now I laugh. Minutes later I will be in solemn, then become wild and mad, then happy, then busy, then sad and sloppy again. So typical of me huh... Ha ha. Used to it already. Been living like this through so many years, since I realised the power of "peer's affection". Told my mum about this when I got home, about me missing this person. Ha ha. She told me to tolerate for a while more. Examinetions in the move, no choice then. Sob sob...I miss you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I finally received the MMS i sent to my own e-mail account on Sunday. Let me just share one of the photos with you guys. My new hair, my black tee, "just got home from Chinese Garden" expression. Ha ha. I wish I could be loved more...

Will be back.

Was filling up and copying my notes and stuff at Singapore Post today with Tessa. She knows I'm not feeling ok these days. So, she bought me the chocolate shortcake from Mark & Spencer. Ha ha. So nice of her. I'm feeling better now lah. Try not to think too much. Kor must be longing for that. Hee... Ming Wei, ex schoolmate came to look for me as as I wanted to return him his shirt. Have not seen him for about 10 months already. Glad that he is still as cheerful and funny as before. All the best!
Actually I didn't want to follow my classmates to Chinese Garden today. But to think of it, it's near my place, might just as well go and take a look, put my thoughts aside and just relax. Had a little fun with the Tessa and Intan there. I was trying to be mad, or I was just mad, behaving like a small little boy. Really deprived of brotherhood. (Someone should know) We saw a lot of animal lanterns there. Well, that is the theme for this year, safari. Then, I saw my bro.!!! Was so surprised! Look here!!! I took a photo with my bro.! Whahahaha! He's so big!! Look at my new hairstyle. Short short. Thanks to capello loft's Jason Ong.
Will not go online till later next week. For now, I need to get some work done and prepare for school again. I should do some work tonight. Kor has been struggling with his work. So I must not be too relaxed also. Must also study. Be a guai guai boy.
Since i will not be putting and more new post for the next few days, let me share with you guys something.

不能和你一起拥有喜悦和悲伤

不管走多远步伐都没有力量

不能和你一起走往着世界幸福方向

孤单的身旁少了坚强

只有简单跟上......

There could be possibility, or I should wake up from dreaming.

Waking Up / My Schedule

Haiz... I'm getting really sensative these days. A bit crazy. Don't really know what's all about these sudden mood swings. I just made things worse. Let me put a stop to all these. Should start to work on my subjects le. I must be fine, to endure all the obstacles I see coming my way. He he... Life will get better I think. *smile*

My Schedule Till School Re-opens:

Thursday - Working on my very own little project with Pei Zhen. Making something.

Friday - Cutting my hair at capello loft. Catch up my work with Tessa at Singapore Post. Missed all holiday lessons. Maybe will ask kor to study also.

Saturday - Outing with Pei Zhen, Wendy & Yim Hor to Crystal Jade. I long for the 'la mian'.

Sunday - Self-study at home, preparing all work and revise all that I can before school starts again. Should be having tea with my secondary school friend at night.

Everything has an end, yes it is. But how long will it last and how? That's the thing. Hope we are all cool and fine. :)

Ends

Holiday is already in the middle now, and soon to the end.
The bag of FOX'S sweets are finishing soon.
My mood swings and reflection periods will also be ending soon. (I will not have time to do so!)
And all the things which I do not want them to end so soon seems ending.
No no NO!
I feel like I'm coming to a turning point in life. Will this new direction be dark? Will there be someone to lead me through. Will there................... Will there....................
So many questions. I'm so lost. I remembered about me typing a post 2 months ago titled Love Bite. Now, it's the bag of FOX'S candies. Similar story but different subjects.
I thinking too much isn't it? Nothing much has ever happened, and I'm here thinking endlessly. I think I better start my revision, rather than to think too much, make things seem worse. Crazy. Treasure what you have now. Don't think too much. Things will get straight. If not, just trip over and get up once again. I mean, that's life anyway. I will just put all these thoughts to a later date, when I have more time and is more sober.

A Bit Better From The War In Me

Wasn't in a good mood these few days. Intended to just stay at home for this vacation. So confused inside. I don't know what to do. What am I doing? Why do I have to face this?

Sadness is when you meet the right person at the wrong time...

I met a wrong person just 2 months ago. And now, I got my play back. This time, having the wrong time.

I'm feeling better actually. It's good to sometime just close yourself up and reflect. What's right and wrong. What you should do. You may somehow come to an enlightment. I got better after listening to a Chinese song called 'Love is simple' in English. Music does move me. I felt a little bad venting my anger on my bro. yesterday. He was nice and calm, and I was there talking rude to him through MSN followed by ignoring him until not long ago. I was just down, and now that I'm sober, I want to apologise.

Guess i will not post for these few days. I'm tired, too tired. I need a rest.

Reunion & Surprise Tomorrow

Finally! The four are back in action together! Yes. After so many weeks of 'busy having our own life', we manage to get back and hit the photoprint shops today, the last day of Hungry Ghost Festival. We saw this as a celebration for Wendy who's going to shake her tail off the torturous job attachment, and Yim who will be startin her's very soon (she's the lucky one, always get good jobs). Having said earlier last week that they are three of my six most important people, I was pretty happy today. At least, they helped me to forget about thinking too much about my current situation, about the 'too dependent' story. I had the urge to look for him today, since we were that near. Ok ok, back to main story. Today is the last day of Hungry Ghost Festival. So, I decided to have a grand finale for this special day. To help in eating up more food. Haha. I really ate alot today, like rubbish bin, kept throwing thing into my stomach. I drank to glasses of milk for a start, ate a big load of fries, a packet of chicken rice, a cup of cheese sausage with mash potatoe & caramelised onions, chicken cream soup with a chunk of huge size of bread, a little dory fish, a little fish n chips, a little large size fries, a little waffle shaped potatoe weghes, and a set of huge crispy chicken cutlet with potatoe weghes and vegetables to conclude. I haven't even include all the drinks I had today. A beautiful full-stop to this year Hungry Ghost Festival. Ha ha, I'm fed, filled, satisfied(not emotionally). What a food day I had. The three of them were amazed, at the kind of appitite I some times posessed. I amused them once again after so many months. Ha ha! My appitite is back! I can eat eat eat, eat all I want! We took photoprints again after dinner. This time, although not as good, we were mad. This one is just a not so mad photo of us. We were crazy! It was really fun. Hah!!! Anyway, we have some programmes tomorrow, but I have a special urgent appointment to make with a certain someone tomorrow. Hah. Yah, you will get the massage you have been waiting for. Hahaha! Let me sleep first!
Oh My God!!!
I Miss You!!!
Can't wait to sleep now and wake up fast tomorrow!!!

Big & Small

Big and small. A basketballer and a dancer. Two bears for hugs. Are they cute?

Target Setting For Promotional Examination

Accounts - A

Economics - C

Management - O (because i didn't sit for both common test and mid year papers)

GP - C6

Chinese - B4

Emm...realistic. I'm gonna make it.

You are going to make it too. It's just this short period of time. Strike! Chiong! Fight and score! I believe in you. You must jia you. Will keep worrying until your exams is over. You will have my support. Need chicken soup? Hee...